I hear my voice traveling down the hall towards me...songs from my record playing low volume in the dark room of sleeping daughters.
My biggest fans share this same roof with me.
Nothing is more humbling, moving, than knowing these little ones want me with them like this as they drift off to sleep. That they are drawn to this music...that they know the words!
Today we uncovered a basket of old tapes. That's right. I said TAPES. As in, cassette tapes. Remember?
I used to take my mom's little tape recorder--yes, TAPE RECORDER--and push Play and Record at the same time (you know exactly what I'm talking about) and record myself singing, sometimes talking, occasionally even tap dancing. :)
So today, we brought down the one CD player in the house that does still have a functional cassette tape player, and we listened to 8 yo me doing my very best Amy Grant impression..."what a difference you've made in my life, what a difference you've made in my LIFE, you're my sunshine day and ni-i-ight, oh, what a difference you've made...". And 12 yo me talking from my bedroom in Karlsruhe, Germany, to my friend Jodi, who had moved back to the states (never mailed it!), explaining important changes that had been made to my bedroom decor, and yes, more Amy Grant impressions..."I have found the place where I can hide, I'm safe inside your arms of love...".
And I'm thinking about things that stay.
At least, what we create that may--very likely will--outlive us.
I admit there is satisfaction and pleasure in the idea of this handful of people here in my home carrying my work, my compositions, around with them as they walk through life. They will carry it beyond me and beyond the places I have walked myself. There is a good chance my grandchildren will hear some of it, hum the tunes.
That's good. But...I wonder...
What else am I creating? What else are we passing on? What else will they remember and retell?
I hope it's Truth and the Beauty that radiates there.
I hope it's Love.
I hope its Joy!
I hope it's Gentleness and Forgiveness and Peace.
I hope it's ... Humility.
I hope these are recorded on their hearts and will be sung to our great great great grandchildren and to their great grandchildren. I hope and imagine each one of us adding to the melody, a progression, a voice, a new line of poetry, as it passes from hand to hand and heart to heart...
Of course, it isn't beginning here. I also fell asleep listening.
I hear a voice traveling....