A wise woman said to me recently, "Just because people are listening doesn't mean I have anything to say!"
That's sort of how I feel right now. Not that I assume many people are listening. But you're here. And I haven't been because honestly, I'm having a sort of epiphany-free couple of weeks so far. And the project is in the waiting place...have you read Dr. Seuss's book Oh, the Places You'll Go? He talks about the waiting place. Anyway, it's not where the party's at, but it's sometimes necessary.
I'm watching and wondering and praying and hoping. I have friends experiencing tremendous life crises. I have friends experiencing renewal and soul-opening understanding. The government is trying to figure out how to save us. People are bringing new people into the world, and people are leaving the world. Weather is happening. Life is happening, and the river is carrying us all along. And while I'm floating in this rather quiet, shady passage, you may be hanging on for dear life because of a nasty current, dodging fallen tree limbs.
Along the way, I will be there, too, and by then, you will be somewhere else.
I think one of the dangers wherever we are is to start thinking too much about how it feels. If I wake up wondering a lot about what would make me feel happy and comfortable in the next 30 minutes...the day is not off to a great start. Suddenly, people are in my way! The coffee is rather weak, and my house is just not up to par in so many ways. The responsibilities that come with the many good things I have in life are suddenly too much to bear, and I am resorting to whatever unhealthy compulsive behavior is my special (pretzels in Nutella??) of the day.
Do you know what I mean? I do not mean that it's good to be repressed people. I'm not suggesting we avoid healthy introspection or recognition of our very real emotions. I'm just talking about our tendency to make ourselves the center of our own universe, to be the first thing on our own minds when we wake up, and be constantly checking the thermometer to see how happy and satisfied we are.
Maybe it's just me. But I doubt it. :)
How do we find a better way? It ultimately begins--I believe--in that deepest place where you walk in relationship with your Maker--or not. It has to do with where your spiritual eyes are focused.
But I think one practical place to start is to initiate a discipline of gratitude. I've found that if I wake up and force myself to give thanks to God for five blessings He has brought into my life, seriously...my spirit is in a whole different place as the day begins. It seems that gratitude and discontent are not friends.
Five things? That's nothing.
I have so much to be thankful for! I think you do, as well. And I do mean even in those hanging-on-for-dear-life seasons. Even then. There is something...life, possibility of hope, a kind word, a hot cup of coffee, a son or daughter, sister or brother, sweet memories, time, music, beauty, planet Earth! If you're finding you just can't come up with anything, I would encourage you to ask for help. Really. Ask for help.
"Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances..."
I Thessalonians 5:18
Funny how I can always find something to talk about. :)
BTW...the orphan-care and adoption benefit concert was an awesome night. Many thanks to all who came and supported!